Buddha’s core message was about the impermanence and uncertainty of life. His teachings were about the Sunya, Void, or No Mind. This is the way of the coach too.
Even if one is not a Buddhist, mere intelligence would tell us that life is uncertain, fleeting, and impermanent. As Buddha said,’ it’s about the one breath you have now.’ Buddha’s five followers noticed his radiance as he opened his eyes after he experienced nirvana, the state of void. They asked him to share what made him radiant. Buddha shared with them the 4 noble truths, which are the core tenets of Buddhism.
- Life is impermanent. Sadness follows happiness
- Sadness results from selfish wants, expectations, and attachments
- Nirvana, extinguishing attachments frees us from sadness
- Attachments can be extinguished by the 8-fold path
Impermanence
Life is impermanent, uncertain and ever-changing. It’s as Buddha had said, a breath long. Sadness or sorrow or disappointment or frustration follows happiness or joy or high dopamine state, surely as night follows day, and death follows life.
Change is a constant. Yet, we wish for change only when it suits us. Bosses are perfect and want subordinates to change. Men want women to change, because of no earthly reason. Parents want children to change, though they are the ones who made all the mistakes. Life is a comedy, though outcomes are often tragic.
Wants and Needs
Change, when desired by us, is always a want, rarely a need. When the neighbour air-conditions their house, ours gets unbearably warm. Wants are borrowed, in envy and greed. Unfortunately, greed has no limits. Ramana Maharishi said, ’this earth can fulfil the needs of many billions, but not the greed of even one.’
Wants and needs are part of our belief and value systems. They are about what we think we ought to have. Needs are essential to life. Wants are luxuries we borrow from what others have. The shift from needs to wants creates the sorrow Buddha speaks about.
Disengagement
The only way we can break through the vicious spiral of greed and fear, with attachment to what we want, fear to lose, retain and obsess, is to be content with our basic needs of comfort, and disengaged from attachment to what others around us have and experience, and even beyond what they may have and experience.
Systemic 8-fold Path
These 8 are coaching competencies we should follow.
- Systemic Perception
- Systemic intention
- Systemic Communication
- Systemic Outcome
- Systemic way of life
- Systemic Effort
- Systemic Awareness
- Systemic Consciousness
Purists can squirm. Buddha would approve. If we coach with the understanding of Buddha’s truths, in disengaged compassion, coaching can be transformational.
